Every day at my house has a certain level of excitement. Of course people have different definitions of excitement but mine is equal with bungee jumping with a frayed bungee cord over a pad of solid cement. That's just how I roll.
Last night, though, was no different. It was a special, fun-filled evening at Casa De Sornie as I walked upstairs to one of our house's back bedrooms and witnessed something I had only heard of before (via the old lady).
It was our rahter odd (crazy) neighbor behind us mowing his "lawn" (a patch of various weeds littered with piles of retaining wall blocks, landscaping timbers, patio pavers and dog shit) that hasn't moved in the over three years we've owned this house. Now some are thinking "what the holy hell is funny about some hillbilly mowing his lawn?" Well, picture a guy wearing a threadbare muscle shirt and sweatpant-style shorts pushing his landmower with one hand around the various obstacles he hasn't move in well over three years as he struggles to not chop up the electrical cord powering his lawnmower.
First off, kudos to Senor Insanity for doing his part to avoid using a miniscule amount of gasoline. Secondly, who actually thought that an electrical cord combined with a quickly rotating and sharp metal blade was a good idea?
Apparently, Captain Crazy thought this was the best way to spend a couple hundred bucks from his steady flow of cash he somehow receives from not having a job.
To us, it was laugh therapy to see him throwing the cord about, keeping the mower from rolling over the various piles of crap on his "lawn" and hearing him, over the noise of the mower, cussing and cursing various things but nothing clearly discernible and even possibly having some sort of person to person conversation although nobody else was present.
I'll end this by saying it was hard to stifle my laughter after I had already finished mowing my lawn. Hell, Commandant Bonkers would have been better served by a push reel mower. See, I really do have a crazy neighbor. If only I had the foresight to snap some undercover, papparazzi-style photos.
10 comments:
I had a neighbor once that would sit in his front yard every evening in a camp chair and spray the hose at his lawn. Except he could only reach a certain portion of his lawn from the chair. So there was one semi-circle of green grass in his yard and the rest was brown.
*chuckle*
Perhaps the laugh was on you though. I'll bet he plugged into your outdoor socket! ha ha
I'll slap that knuckle-dragger's mullet clean off his neckless body if he's plugging into my power holes.
Duuude, you could've gotten top dollar for photos of that!
You need to be better prepared is all I'm gonna say....
Where I work, the inmates call a "threadbare muscle shirt" a "wife-beater." Hopefully this hillbilly didn't have too much pent-up aggression after his lawn-cutting ceremony.
Oh my...
I think I would still take your neighbor over mine, though. My neighbors next to my new place are...well...the kind that think if I'm home, they should come over. Uninvited. All.The.Time. So yea, a lawn moving psycho sounds pretty good right now. But no worries, I don't want a trade--I don't wish my neighbors on anyone. Plus, the entertainment value in your neighborhood would drop, and we can't have that, right? :D
--snow
That is funny...I guess he is going "green!"
I feel the need to add that midway through yesterday's BBQ, someone found a tremendously large, steam dog turd on our lawn. If he can't reign in his small horsedogs, someone may just report him for something and start an epic neighbor battle.
lmao -- hard to stifle MY laughter after reading this post! I can totally picture it.
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